Candice Watters and Carolyn McCulley are co-guests on a pair of episodes of the Focus on The Family radio program with Dr. James Dobson. Each has written a provocative and helpful book on singleness and the process toward marriage (should God bring it to pass). Their conversation with Dr. Dobson is stimulating and insightful as to how single women can (a) pursue mature and fruitful femininity (irrespective of their marital state), (b) help make marriage happen, and (c) not live as if their lives are on hold.
I tried to walk the fine line in a Boundless article I wrote a few months ago. Here was my conclusion:
An essential aspect of loving singles is being open to helping them in the process toward marriage, while recognizing:
* our relationship with Christ is more important than our marital state
* some singles are uniquely gifted to remain single for greater kingdom effectiveness
* many singles struggle profoundly with loneliness, lust, fornication, and the like, and welcome (or should welcome) loving, gracious, and balanced input on the process toward marriage from Christians who care about their souls and their bodies
* for most, marriage will be a means of profound sanctification, and they ought to responsibly (and diligently) move in this direction even as they embrace other adult responsibilities
* just as God ordains the ends, He ordains the means. The means may include overcoming your fear and telling a girl how you feel. They may include giving a guy a chance, even though you grew up seeing your parents go through a divorce, and you’ve closed your heart like a shell.